Forgiveness Heals You

“As for you, you planned evil against me, but God planned it for good, in order to do this — to keep many people alive — as it is today.”

Genesis 50:20

Over 20 years have passed since Joseph’s brothers sold him into slavery. A lot has happened and changed in these 20 years. These boys have grown up, matured, changed in their appearance and their attitudes. More than likely, they thought they would never see each other again. When someone has deeply and emotionally wounded you, you may have hopes to never see them again. I have said the words, “If I ever see them again, it will be too soon.” Have you ever said or thought that exact same thing? It’s hard to face those who have hurt you. You don’t know what to say to them and you definitely don't want to think about forgiving them. I have held a grudge for the majority of my life. I was wounded emotionally as a child and I never thought I would be able to forgive and move past the damage done. I’m sure we all have a similar story.

How long have you lived with the grudge you are carrying around?

Take a minute and actually bring it into the light, what past hurt are you still holding onto that is weighing you down?

We see in these four chapters that Joseph has seen his brothers. The reality he was trying to forget has now been brought before him. He knows who they are but they do not know him. Joseph’s language and appearance has taken on Egyptian characteristics after living in Egypt for so many years. There is no reason for the brothers to think that Joseph would be the man selling them their grain. A boy who was sold into slavery could never work his way up to the man in charge of all of Egypt’s land, could he? By the power and grace of God, he could. In chapter 42, it tells of Joseph’s brothers falling on their knees and bowing down to the man that is to sell their family food. The man that is providing for all the people of Egypt and the surrounding land. The man that makes all the decisions for the Pharaoh’s land. The man that has more power than they could imagine. These brothers are bowing down to Joseph. This scene is the fulfillment of Joseph’s dream that made the brother’s angry and hate him. This is the first scene that proves God’s hand at work through Joseph’s life. God knew what was to come. God placed Joseph in the authoritative position he was in for a reason, to save the people from starvation during the famine. In able for Joseph to succeed in this position, Joseph needed to grow in his faith, maturity, and dependence on God. He also needed to be placed in front of Pharaoh so that he could be offered the position. God orchestrates and fine tunes our lives in ways we can’t even imagine. This brings a question to my mind, “How do I know I’m allowing God to do this kind of work in my life? How do I keep from taking control and giving it fully to God?”

How have you seen God’s hand guide and mold your life?

When have there been times that you wanted the control and that led to decisions that were not guided by God?

Are you going through a time right now that you are yearning for understanding? Take time to pray and ask God to give you insight into His plan for your life.

Joseph sold his brothers the grain they needed but he made sure they would come back. He did not want this to be the last time he saw them. Why do you think Joseph did not reveal himself to them during the first encounter? Joseph could have been so stunned that he needed time to think about how to handle seeing his brothers again. He could have wanted to see his brother Benjamin, his only full-blooded brother. He devised a plan to get his brother Benjamin to Egypt. He could have wanted to inquire about his father but did not know how to do it without coming across as strange to these men that were supposed to be strangers. He also could have been testing his brothers to see if their hearts and attitudes had changed since they sold him into slavery. There are many reasons Joseph could have for not revealing himself and coming up with ways to see his brothers again.

By Joseph placing the money back in the sack of grains, he was setting his brothers up for a chance for them to show honesty or deceit. Had his brothers changed? When they had to return back to Egypt for more grain they refused to go without Benjamin. Now keep in mind, it has been months since they were there the first time. Simeon has been in prison for months and awaiting his brothers return with Benjamin. This visit is when Joseph invites them to feast with him. The brothers return with the extra money they had in their sacks and other highly valuable specialty items. They want to be sure that Joseph understands that they did not try to trick him and they did pay for their grain. They were scared they would all be Egyptian slaves or put in prison for stealing. Joseph knew what was going on all along. This is when Joseph brings up his father, Jacob, and he gets word that he is alive and well. He also gets to see his brother, Benjamin, with his own eyes. This is when emotion overfills Joseph. He cannot contain the sadness of being apart from them for so many years but also the joy of knowing they are alive and well. The Hebrew idiom for the emotion shown by Joseph is nikhmeru rachamayw, meaning “his mercies became heated.” The only other place in the Bible where this emotion is shown is in 1 Kings 3:26 where two women are wanting the same child and King Solomon says to split the boy down the middle and give a half to each woman. The mother of the child shows this compassionate emotion and gives the child up so that he will live. King Solomon knows by her actions that she is the boys true mother. This is the kind of emotion Joseph is overcome with.

Joseph also arranged the seating arrangement for his brothers by their birth order. This was the first sign to them that something was odd about this man. How did he know their birth order? Why was all this happening to them? The last test was the silver cup that was put in one of their sacks of grain. The brothers left after the strange feast and were stopped shortly after leaving with accusations of stealing Joseph’s silver cup. They denied the accusations and held their sacks out to be searched. The cup was found in Benjamin’s sack. Judah pleaded with Joseph to let them go, that they did not steal the cup. He explained everything about their father and how his heart would be broken if they went home without Benjamin. The thought of Jacob living in more misery was too much for Joseph to bear. He finally revealed himself to his brothers.

What are your thoughts on Joseph’s tests on his brothers? What do you think was the meaning of these tests?

How have you tested people that have done you wrong?

How have you kept your heart guarded after being hurt by an individual?

“Then Joseph said to his brothers, ‘I am Joseph! Is my father still living?’ But his brothers were not able to answer him, because they were terrified at this presence. Then Joseph said to his brothers, ‘Come close to me.’ When they had done so, he said, ‘I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt! And now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. For two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five years there will be no plowing and reaping. But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance.” Genesis 45:4-7

Wow! I just need to sit in that paragraph for a minute or two. The emotional stability it took for Joseph to stand in front of his brothers and say those words is astonishing. There is no way we can get to that point of forgiveness and understanding without God’s mighty hand in our lives. Let’s break down Joseph’s reveal. He first simply states who he is and he shows concern for his father showing that he would love to see his father. He brought them in closer to him. They had an intimacy that only family can have. Even though they had been apart for years, they were still close through their family bond. Joseph stated and reminded them of what they had done to him by selling him to the Egyptians. He did not forget the cruel deed they had done. But, then he immediately told them to not stress over it or regret it. He gave the control to God, the one who is sovereign over our lives. God had strategically orchestrated this plan for Joseph to save the people. Joseph was saying, “Don’t put yourself on the throne as the ones in control, God has always been in control and is still the one in control.” Joseph was not giving his brothers a get out of jail free card, he made it clear that he had not forgotten what they did to him but he had forgiven them. He forgave them. This forgiveness did not happen only when he saw his brothers, it was something that took many years and a lot of work to get to. Forgiveness does not come easily. Joseph could have still held a grudge on his brothers, but through God’s work in his life, he was able to accept his struggles and see that God can even use evil to fulfill His ultimate plan.

Joseph sent his brothers back to Canaan to get his father and their families and return to Egypt so that they would have land and food. God’s plan was to send Jospeh ahead to preserve his family’s lives, save Egypt, and prepare the way for the beginning of the nation of Israel. God’s plans are not dictated by human actions. If you have experienced someone doing evil towards you, remember that they are only tools to God. He can make something beautiful out of our struggles.

“You intended harm to me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” Genesis 50:20

Who do you need to forgive? What is standing in your way of forgiving them?

What is the first step you can take to forgiveness?

Remember, you don’t have to forget to forgive, but you do have to have a heart change and God is the only one that can help with that. Through Joseph’s faith and obedience in God, he was blessed with a forgiving heart. This forgiveness gave him everything he desired in life. He was reunited with his family, he was utilized by God to fulfill His plan, and he grew closer in his walk with God. Joseph’s forgiveness healed him.

How can forgiveness heal you?

What have you learned from Joseph that you need to initiate in your life?